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Venture Capital
THE ROCKET ADVOCATE
Where Money Meets Mild Delusion
The Venture Capital section of The Rocket Advocate is our dedicated space for tracking the mysterious movements of Queensland's investor class – the people who made their money in real estate but now call themselves "tech investors." While the AFR rushes to publish every whispered rumor of partner drama and fund implosions before confirming if the fund even exists, we take a more measured approach: we wait at least 45 minutes before publishing unverified VC gossip.
THE MONEY TRAIL
Detailed reporting on where Queensland VC money actually goes, with our proprietary "Founder Connection Index" revealing how many investments went to people who attended the same private schools as the partners. Includes our regular feature: "Things VCs Will Fund Instead of Female Founders."
FUND FORMATIONS
Breaking coverage of new Queensland venture funds, from announcement to first close to the inevitable "we're taking a more focused approach to investing" email that arrives when the fund realizes startups actually need to make money eventually. We'll analyse their investment theses, which typically range from "whatever is hot in Silicon Valley right now" to "whatever our limited partners' kids think is cool."
LP CONFIDENTIAL
A look behind the curtain at the limited partners backing Queensland's VCs, answering pressing questions like "Wait, who's actually funding these people?" and "Do the superannuation funds know what their money is doing?
TERM SHEET TRANSLATIONS
Regular breakdowns of term sheet jargon, helping founders understand that "standard terms" means "heavily favoring investors" and "founder-friendly" means "slightly less hostile than indentured servitude." We'll decode phrases like "participation preferences" so you don't have to pretend you understand them at networking events.
VC PERSONALITY PROFILES
In-depth features on Queensland's venture capitalists that go beyond their carefully curated LinkedIn profiles and Medium posts. We'll reveal their investment philosophies, their greatest hits and misses, and how many times they've tweeted that "AI is going to change everything" without specifying how or why.
EXIT STRATEGIES
Our most-read column, tracking the gap between announced exit values in press releases and the actual terms uncovered through our investigative reporting. Includes our popular "Acquihire or Just Hire?" flowchart to determine if that was actually a successful exit or just a glorified job offer.
The Rocket Advocate: Where we take Queensland's tech scene seriously enough to make fun of it properly.
EXIT STRATEGIES
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